Just five more days was all we had with him.
When I took Avery to see the cardiologist last Monday, I knew his heart condition would shorten his life. But I had been thinking we'd have him with us for at least several more months, if not longer. Five months, maybe. Not five days.
On Friday morning, as we were letting the dogs out, Alayne noticed Avery didn't seem to be doing well -- kind of listless, not himself. He'd had diarrhea in his crate overnight, so we wrapped him in a towel and carried him outside. Alayne set him on the ground, and he just keeled over and lay on his side. She scooped him up, held him for a bit, and he seemed to perk up. She set him down again, and this time he was able to stand. He did his business (more diarrhea), and then just stood there, looking weak. Alayne picked him up and carried him into the house; I fixed up some bedding in a large open crate we call a "boat," and she set him down in it.
We could tell something was clearly wrong, and I told her I would go call the cardiologist and find out what Plan B was. Alayne stayed behind to pet him and love on him. I put two more dogs out on my way down the hall, and then went into the living room to find the cardiologist's business card. Just as I was heading up the stairs to my office to call him, Alayne came through the door. "He just died," she said, tears running down her face.
I was floored. Avery had seemed to make progress on his new heart medications, and our only thought was getting him rechecked by the cardiologist in two weeks. We never expected to lose him this soon.
Alayne and I walked down the hall way to the dog room. Avery was curled up on the bedding, looking like he was just sleeping. But he was gone. We wrapped the towel around him again and Alayne carried his body over to the twin bed along the wall. She sat down on the bed, cradling him and crying. Alayne had really understood Avery and his emotional needs; she had been so patient in working with him, and he responded to her like no one else.
Avery had been on the cover of our 2011 winter/holiday newsletter -- that's the photo above. I opened his story by writing, "Some dogs just never seem to get a break." After the awful life he'd suffered -- beaten by people, attacked by other dogs, eyes painfully swollen from untreated glaucoma -- he'd been turned into a Georgia shelter and was scheduled for euthanasia. That's when Avery finally got his break and came to us. Yet tragically, he was with us for just ten short months.
Rather than recount his full story in this blog post and explain how far he'd come, here's the page from the newsletter if you haven't already read it -- click on the image for a larger version:
Avery had indeed made the most of the break he got. But he deserved so much more.
I was just told about you guys , What wonderful caring people you are . Can I say a big thank you for giving Avery happiness until he crossed the rainbow bridge . I had tears reading about this dogs life but so glad he found you guys till the end . Thank you Pat from Australia
Posted by: Pat | May 31, 2012 at 12:11 PM
Avery deserved...RDF, a true home filled with love, good nutrition and space to play. His years of pain turned around, for 10 months...10 long, wonderful months, to remember. Thank you for sharing Avery with all of "us" and I'm so happy he made the newsletter cover but more importantly, I'm so happy he made his way to you guys. I send my deepest sympathy for your loss of Avery. Much love....
Posted by: boundforglory | March 06, 2012 at 06:05 PM
RIP darling little Avery - I am so glad you finally got so much love.
Posted by: Angela | March 02, 2012 at 11:51 AM
You guys gave him such a wonderful home and such love in his final days. He'll be waiting for you, happy and whole on the other side.
Posted by: Laura | March 02, 2012 at 12:14 AM
Sorry to hear about Avery's passing - our animals are our babies and it hurts when we love one!! You know he is in heaven and it healthy now!!
Posted by: Karen Hudson | March 01, 2012 at 04:51 PM
I am sending you all warm hugs with condolences. He was a very lucky guy for the time he was @ the Rolling Dog Farm. Thank you so very much for making his last months the best for him.
ginger, Tobias & Tlingit
Posted by: ginger | February 29, 2012 at 03:58 AM
I'm crying with you, and for you. Alayne, I know you were especially close to the little guy and I'm so sorry that his sweet life ended so soon after you got him. Oh, we are just so glad he got to know real love and tender care with you. God bless and comfort you all.
Posted by: Lisa K. from CA | February 28, 2012 at 05:30 PM
Dear Steve and Alayne,
So. so sorry to hear about Avery's passing over the Rainbow
Bridge. He had a wonderful 10 months with you. You loved him so deeply.You will see him again.
Love,
Shirley and all the animals
Four Winds Farm Sanctuary
Posted by: Shirley Parr | February 28, 2012 at 03:18 PM
I just read about the passing of Avery. I am just in tears!
I take comfort that he spent his last months in a loving home. The two of you have been through this kind of things many times, but I am sure it is never easy. God bless both of you!
Bruce Korusek
Richmond, Virginia
Posted by: Bruce Korusek | February 28, 2012 at 01:58 PM
i am sorry to hear of avrey's passing. nothing can really stop the pain of loss, but the sweet memories of his life will be with you forever. thank you for taking such good care of this baby.
Posted by: Ema | February 28, 2012 at 01:14 PM
I am so sorry Avery left so soon. Yet you gave him a wonderful gift: the freedom to be happy and safe. What a precious gift that is. Thank you for all you are, and as always: remember to be kind to yourself too. Hugs & love.
Posted by: bregda & boemsie (south africa) | February 28, 2012 at 07:35 AM
So so sad to hear of your loss of dear sweet Avery! I know your hearts are painfully broken right now, but I hope you can cherish the love he brought into your lives, & even more so, the love you bestowed upon this beautiful creature of God's.
Posted by: Susie Yates | February 27, 2012 at 10:37 PM
All of our hearts ache for Avery and all he went through in his life.Caring people can not even imagine how someone could be so cruel to a sweet animal.It is indeed a blessing that the last months of his life was with the two of you, so the last he knew was comfort and love. Even when he died he was with Alyne, so he left being loved. I know I cried when I read the blog, so I can imagine how you two must feel. Again, thank you for what you do for all the animals in your care. I am so sorry for your loss.
Posted by: Vicki | February 27, 2012 at 08:50 PM
Dear Alayne and Steve--I'm so sorry about your loss of Avery--You two are so wonderful with the love you give to God's furry creatures--Bless you ! Nancy and Ladybug in SC
Posted by: Nancy Longfield | February 27, 2012 at 07:31 PM
I am so thankful there are people like you who give unconditional love. His life with you may not have been long but he died knowing how much he was loved. A lucky little dog.
Posted by: Linda Magee | February 27, 2012 at 07:06 PM
Avery is one reason I vote everyday. So you can hopefully win more money to help make it possible to help more of the little Avery's and Billy's etc of this world. Not everyone is a good owner to their animals. I am glad you are here as a small safety net for some of the animals that need assistance. Thanks.
Posted by: Anne in FL | February 27, 2012 at 05:36 PM
There has to be a special place in Hell for Avery's former owner. Like you, I wish he had more time to know what love and kindness are about. Yet once again I hear myself saying how sorry I am for your loss.
Posted by: Kathleen Rivard | February 27, 2012 at 05:30 PM
I'm so sorry. It's really heartbreaking that he didn't get more time to enjoy his new life. But at least you can be comforted by the knowledge that his last months were the best that you could make them, and at at the end he was surrounded by love and kindness.You made such a difference in his life, and I'm sure he appreciated every minute.
Posted by: Tonya Allen | February 27, 2012 at 04:59 PM
I am so sorry for your lossrip Avery
Posted by: Ginette | February 27, 2012 at 03:31 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. I know from our adopted dogs when each of them act in a special silly way with each of us that we made a strong and special bond with them. The connection is there. And you guys clearly make that difference with all the animals entrusted to you. There time sense is different. Their with you for their life time. And their lives with you are as good as a pets life can be! Feel better knowing that.
Posted by: Carolyn Leavitt | February 27, 2012 at 03:03 PM
Oh, how sad! I was so hoping Avery could have years, not just short months with you. At least he died knowing that there are kind, loving people in this world and that he was not "all bad". You must have spent many hours working for and with this beautiful, abused dog. Thank you for gently determining his needs and acting on them. It is so difficult for caretakers and family (of which you were both), particularly in these extra sad situations. You have my deepest sympathy.
Posted by: Phyllis Snow | February 27, 2012 at 02:14 PM
Steve and Alayne, this one hurts even a simple blog reader at such a basic level that I can't imagine how hard it has hit you who cared for him so dearly. My sincere sympathies. He knew joy through you - we all just wish it was longer.
You should know that because of your work and the awareness of the needs of unwanted animals that you've raised in me - I adopted a rescue dog with medical needs from a shelter last year. I had previously only ever considered a dog from a breeder. My little Heidi is one more unwanted little dog receiving the medical care and the love she deserved - because of the work you do. So, indirectly, she is another RDF success story!
Posted by: Carol Moerth | February 27, 2012 at 02:04 PM
So sorry to hear about Avery. His time with you was short, but he definitely was loved and made comfortable.
Hugs to you all.
Posted by: Tagati | February 27, 2012 at 02:00 PM
I'm so sorry for the loss of little Avery, he looks so sweet in that picture. You guys are both so strong it is truly inspiring, Bless you!
Katy
Posted by: Katy | February 27, 2012 at 01:18 PM
Very sorry and sad for you. Even tho it was only 5 days, he had love and care for the first time. God Bless
Posted by: Linda Murphy | February 27, 2012 at 12:32 PM
Dogs live in the moment. You made his ten months all moments of love and safety. You are wonderful, giving, unselfish people. If dogs are man's best friend, you, Steve and Alayne, are dogs' best friends.
Hugs to you in this sad time.
Debbie
Posted by: Debbie Burke | February 27, 2012 at 12:20 PM
Such sad, sad news - my heart goes out to both of you. May it give your hearts some comfort to know Avery knew he was cherished by you. Rest in peace, little one.
Posted by: Ruth | February 27, 2012 at 12:08 PM
Such a two sided sword, this work you do. The joy of giving such TLC to such gracious, forgiving creatures, and seeing them respond with health and happiness is your reward. But you have to face grief so many times a year, and this is really your special gift to the animal world, your willingness to go through it with them.
I cry with you each time you loose one. Sweet little Avery was finally blessed with a peaceful exit from this world to the next. Blessing to you both for the willingness to provide such love, even tho it is coupled with such grief for you both.
Posted by: Diane Borden, Chehalis, WA | February 27, 2012 at 12:07 PM
I'm so sorry. Avery had so much love in the last months of his life...so that's what he'll know as he moves on. That he was loved, loved, loved.
Posted by: Lisa Lashaway | February 27, 2012 at 11:44 AM
I'm so very sorry Steve and Alayne! Rereading Avery's story, it's crystal clear that your love and patience to teach Avery that he indeed could be happy, after his terrible times before your care, were the most priceless gift one could give him. I only wish he could give you more waggles and smiles. You were what he desperately needed. His heart has touched us all. Thank you for your kindness and loving care.
Posted by: Margaret | February 27, 2012 at 11:35 AM
Sorry for your loss of sweet Avery. How wonderful that he was at home with Alayne when he left. Even more wonderful was the last 10 months of his life in a home where people loved him and gave him a good life.
Thanks for what you all do.
Posted by: Dee | February 27, 2012 at 11:06 AM
I'm so sorry to hear about sweet Avery.
Posted by: Dawn | February 27, 2012 at 11:01 AM
We never have them long enough. Thankfully Avery knew love in his lifetime. So very sorry for your loss.
Posted by: Carolyn Kupferschmid | February 27, 2012 at 10:54 AM
RIP - He died knowing what love was really all about! That's all that matters!!
Posted by: Toni Ezell | February 27, 2012 at 10:48 AM
I am so sorry. Rest in peace, sweet Avery.
Posted by: Linda | February 27, 2012 at 10:42 AM
My heart goes out to you both for all of the pain you must go through every time you lose one of your precious animals. Thank you for all you did for Avery. You gave him a chance to know love before he left this earth.
Posted by: Melissa | February 27, 2012 at 10:30 AM
You are both angels for doing what you do for animals. It has to be so hard when you lose them. How wonderful it was for Avery to know he had a loving family the last months of his life, RIP sweet furbaby!
Posted by: Sue Wasko | February 27, 2012 at 10:17 AM
Run free sweet Avery. You were dearly loved by Steve and Alayne and so many of us too.
You blessed us all with your presence and many hearts are breaking now over your passing.
Posted by: Chloe | February 27, 2012 at 10:10 AM
OH NO....tears are just streaming down my face right now....my heart just breaks for you all...Avery was so blessed to be so loved by you...and you were so blessed to have been loved by him....God Rest you sweetest Avery....much love, Valerie xo
Posted by: Valerie | February 27, 2012 at 10:00 AM
Please find comfort in the thought that Avery's last emotion was feeling total love and safety in the arms of his very favorite person.
Posted by: Colleen and Wes | February 27, 2012 at 09:57 AM
Though so very sad sweet Avery is no longer here, I am comforted knowing he had an exceptional 10 months of unconditional love with you and Alayne. My heart is with you both.
Posted by: Barbara Techel | February 27, 2012 at 09:46 AM
I'm so glad that he had the time with you that he did, and finally go to know human love. I have a cocker girl who's story is very similar to Avery's- she was so scared and would pee if we tried to pick her up. It was months before she would even make eye contact with us, and even longer before she would wag her tail and play.
She's a much happier girl now, much like Avery was with you. I'm so grateful for all that you do for these wonderful dogs (and cats and horses!)
Posted by: Barb | February 27, 2012 at 09:39 AM
RIP, sweet Avery. They were the best 10 months of your life. And you got to relax and be a real dog and enjoy love and acceptance with Steve and Alayne and all your brother and sister dogs. Kisses on your little face.
Posted by: Janet in Cambridge | February 27, 2012 at 09:35 AM
Poor little boy :( I'm so thankful he lingered long enough for you to be with him in his last few moments...
Posted by: Amber L | February 27, 2012 at 09:33 AM
I am very sorry to learn that Avery has gone. His break did indeed come late, but not too late for him. He discovered that he hadn't forgotten how to be happy and you went into his world to help him along that path, sometimes by just leaving him in peace...at others by doing what he showed you he needed to have done. Thank you and thanks to him for teaching us how to live.
Posted by: Christopher Davis | February 27, 2012 at 09:22 AM
So sorry to hear about Avery and so sorry for both you and Alayne losing him so suddenly. His life with you released him from all that had gone before. He died a happy, more confident dog knowing that he was safe, protected and loved.
Posted by: Jan in Winnipeg | February 27, 2012 at 09:13 AM
His enlarged heart was at least filled full of love for his last months. Thank you for doing that for him and for all that you do.
Posted by: Leslie | February 27, 2012 at 09:03 AM
Alayne and Steve, my heart is breaking for sweet Avery and for you. I believe with all my heart that all dogs go to Heaven, and that Avery is there now, running and playing, with a healthy body, eyes that see, and no fears. I pray for your comfort as you grieve this special little guy. Sending hugs & love from Texas.
Posted by: Kristi Gross | February 27, 2012 at 08:38 AM
Rest in peace Avery. So sorry for your loss. You gave him a wonderful home and did everything possible for him.
Posted by: Toby Preston | February 27, 2012 at 07:59 AM
I am so sorry to hear about Avery. As I sit here with tears running down my face.I just want to say Thank you Steve and Alayne for what you do. You are both so special.
Posted by: Sonja Matzkanin | February 27, 2012 at 07:56 AM